• Andrea Kennedy

How Emotions have Ruled your Life

Are all our problems rooted to our emotions? Here's the case for "Yes!"

Our earliest interactions with parents, family and others elicit emotions and then beliefs which create patterns that dictate how we cope and navigate life. In particular, these patterns also shape our perceptions of who we are including our sense of worthiness and how flawed we believe ourselves to be. As a result, what began as emotion leads each of us to create a unique sort of computer-like operating system based on these early experiences. How we relate to others and function in the world largely depends on the operating system and shapes our lives in unlimited ways. This is mostly unconscious because our operating system is camouflaged and intertwined with who we are at our core but we can't separate it out and most don't know where to start. It really feels like us!

When we are under stress, the default to the operating system is enforced and we can react with great speed. Think of an argument you had. In the heat of the moment, how did you do? After it was over and you were in the review phase of what occurred, did you ask yourself why you said certain things? I bet you were so wise and could think of many higher options you wish you said or did instead of saying what flew out of your mouth. Furthermore, it's probably quite true that you have reacted and said very similar things before. But if we know better when we are calm, why do we default back to the old stuff? Simply put, we haven't dismantled the patterns that make up our current operating system.